pregnancy week by week
Showing posts with label reading. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reading. Show all posts

Thursday, 13 March 2008

Deflated Ego

I'm demotivated to write since it doesn't seem like anyone is actually reading.

I am facing this internal struggle. Am I writing for an audience or am I writing for myself? I love having reference to the past online...at my fingertips so that I can reflect and sometimes put the present into perspective. So I guess I shouldn't care about whether anyone ELSE is reading. I suppose it's the egotistical Leo in me that wants attention, comments, compassion, praise and whatever else I've got coming to me.

I know I can have problems with not feeling sorry for myself - sometimes I feel like I'm having a crappy time and it's really handy to go back and check where I was 6 months ago or a year ago. I usually find that my life has improved and that I am doing much better. Then I get to kick myself in the ass and tell myself to stop being an ungrateful brat - because I'm a masochist.

So for everyone not out there, thanks for reading - you lurking trolls!